Thirty days. An entire fucking month since you inexplicably appeared in this God-forsaken land. You look in the distance towards the small village you arrived in.

Damned ponies…

Just a week ago, you were ran off yet again. You’d discovered an apple farm, and stole some apples, and an orange pony ran at you, her little border collie bit your leg. You glance down at the scabs on your ankle.

Stupid dog…

You currently sit in a chair you’d built on the porch of the cabin you also built. You now live in the woods just south of the village. While you hate this land, you at the very least can admire its beauty. A small stream passes by the side of your new home, reaching a small falls and leading its way into town.

You feel you were far enough away that you don’t have to worry about some ballsy stallion slitting your throat at night.

You have a decent source of food, hunting the local deer. They aren’t intelligent, so you don’t have your morals preventing you from killing them. Though you are getting sick of venison, which is why you attempted to steal apples from that orange pony.

It was odd. They speak clear English, despite being in a completely different world.

You are interrupted from your thoughts when you notice something growing in the distance. You keep your eye on it, and after a few minutes it takes form. It appears to be some sort of… carriage? It was being pulled by two ponies, and… it’s heading your direction…

You head inside, grab your homemade spear and run into the woods. After some time, you find a cave, and enter. Luckily there seem to be no threats within, so you feel safe until you hear hoofsteps.

Then you hear it. A beautiful, and majestic voice rings throughout the cave. “It’s alright creature, I will not hurt you.”

You go deeper into the cave, believing it to be a trick.

“Please, I just wish to speak with you.” The voice asks pleadingly. You don’t answer. “I understand you do not trust me. You clearly have no reason to. After all, my ponies haven’t been the most kind to you.” The voice paused. “I am the leader of this land. My name is Princess Celestia, though you may simply call me Celestia. What is your name creature.”

My name, you thought. I’ve been asking that myself since arrived in this damn place.

You sigh. “Just call me,” you pause, thinking. “Anonymous.” Your voice was rough and sore from not speaking for an entire week.

“An odd name. Are you alright, Anonymous?” Celestia asked. “You’ve been alone for a month. I heard about what Applejack did.” You chuckled at the name, remembering the old cinnamon vs. apple commercials from your childhood. “Her dog attacked you, am I correct? I’d like to bring you to the castle, and have you checked up. Make sure you’re healthy. There’s a nice meal in it for you too.” Her voice was kind, and motherly.

Now you were confused. Ever since you’d arrived in this hell-hole, you’d been attacked, insulted, and demonized by the ponies. Then after a month of this bullshit, their leader appears to you and is the first one to show you kindness? What’s her angle. You don’t trust them, why should you trust her?

“What’s the catch?” You ask, coming off a bit more angry than you intended.

“There is no catch. You were mistreated by my subjects, and I merely wish to make it right. Is that so hard to believe?”

“Yes.”

“I’ll tell you what.” She says, her voice unwavering. “Come with me. You are not obligated to stay. You may leave at any time. I will land my carriage if you ask me to. But I do hope you’ll give me a chance.”

You decide to give this some thought. She’s actually given you a chance to speak, which is more than anyone else has. Why not, You think. I can leave at anytime, right?

“Fine.”

“Great! Now please, come out from behind that boulder.”

How’d she – you know what, never mind.

You stand up, and approach the white pony. You immediately notice the difference between her and her subjects? Her head was almost level with yours, though her horn was much longer than the others.

“So, Anonymous?” She says, turning around and trotting towards the cave entrance. You follow her. “I don’t recall seeing your kind before. Tell me, what are you? Where are you from?”

“I’m a human, and I’m from planet Earth.” You answer.

“Planet?” She says, confusion in her voice. “What is a planet?”

“What is– you don’t know what a planet is!?” You ask incredulously. “You know, solar system, orbits the sun?”

“Orbits the sun?” She laughs. “I control the sun.”

Now you were confused, but that confusion quickly turned to anger. Does she think you’re stupid? “Bullshit,” You say accusingly. “Even a child nows how a solar system works. At the center you have a star, our’s is named the sun, there are many planets orbiting that star, one of which is Earth. It is the only habitable planet in the solar system, sitting at the perfect distance from the sun, aka the Goldilocks zone. Some planets have what are called natural satellites, they are smaller than planets and orbit their planet. Earth has one, it’s called the moon.”

The mare looks at you, clearly intrigued by what you are saying.

“Do you have magic?” She asks.

“What? Of course not.”

“Then how do you control the sun and moon?” She looks at you with a gotcha style grin.

“Easy. We don’t. Gravity does. Earth rotates on its own, as it orbits the sun. One side faces the sun, that side of the planet experiences day, the other experiences night. An entire cycle around the sun takes roughly 365 days, which is a year. The moon orbits Earth, and has its own cycles. It’s often visible during the day.”

“Very interesting…” She says. “It would seem to me that you don’t just come from a different world, but an entirely different plane of existence. One with its own rules, laws, and physics.”

“That explains magic then.” You say. “Still don’t know how you speak English though.”

“That’s because we don’t. We speak Equish.”

“Of course.” You say facetiously.

You finally reach the carriage. The four ponies that pull it glare at you. You get in.

“Nervous?” She asks you.

“Yes.”

“First time?”

“No, I’ve been nervous lots of times.”

The mare raises a brow.

“Never mind. No, I’ve flown before.”

“Well then, shall we?”