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Chapter 1: A Job Goes Sideways

“Sir, are you sure this is a good idea?” Moxxie asked.

“Of course it is! We can double the clients by setting up a website on the dark web.” Blitzø answered.

“I know, but…” Moxxie said, nervously. “don’t you think having human clients is a bad idea?”

“We’re all shitty in some way. Humans are just shittier.”

“Hey Blitzø!?” The resident hellhound Loona yelled, interrupting the meeting. “We got an email from the new address!”

“Already?” Blitzø said with a surprised look. “That was fast.”

Blitzø exited the conference room and into the lobby area, where Loona sat at her desk.

“You sure that’s right, Loonie?” Blitzø asked. “The site only went live this morning.”

“It was sent to [email protected],” Loona answered. “That’s the right address, isn’t it?”

“Well it is,” Blitzø mumbled, rubbing his chin in thought. “Tell you what, MM and I have some business to attend to. Why don’t you handle this one?”

“You’re fucking with me.” Loona spoke incredulously. “I’ve wanted a solo mission for forever, and you keep telling me ‘it’s too dangerous, we don’t want our only Loona getting hurt now’.”

“Let’s just say I’ve had a change in heart. You’ve been doing really well lately, and I thought you deserve this one.”

“Thanks da-Blitzø. Thanks Blitzø.”


Chris sat in his apartment waiting nervously. “I’m such a bitch, can’t take myself out. Have to pay some hitman to do it for me.”

He’d just sent an email to some dark web site he’d discovered, asking for a hit to be taken on… himself.

“What if it was a honeypot!?” He realized, panicking. “Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit!”

Suddenly a portal opened up in his kitchen, grabbing his attention. “What in fuck’s name is…” Out stepped what he could only describe as… a wolf-girl. He then thought back to the website, it – oddly enough – had short bios on the hitmen working for I.M.P, one of which was a hellhound. He found it odd as putting yourself out there like that seemed kinda stupid, but who was he to question it. Also strange was the fact that he was now standing before an actual hellhound.

“That was fast.” Chris noted aloud, grabbing the attention of the hellhound.

“You were expecting me?” Loona said, a little creeped out. “Is this some weird kink? If so, I’m turning right back around.”

“No, it’s a not a kink! I promise.” Chris said nervously. “You see, I want you to kill me.”

“What. the. fuck!” Loona yelled.

“Quiet please, I live in an apartment. I have neighbors.”

“Why the fuck would you hire a hit on yourself?” Loona was in hysterics. “Are you suicidal or something?”

“Well, uh. Yeah actually I am.”

Loona was dumbfounded. For her first solo hit, the target was also the client. Her job was to kill the target without question. Morals be damned. If anyone was going to think about who they killed, it was Moxxie. So why was she hesitant to do the job?

Deciding to analyze the situation, she started with her surroundings. First of all, she stood in a kitchen. In front of her was a counter that stood about chest-high. On the other side of the counter was the living room, and on the sofa sat her target/client. Now focusing on the target, loona looked as what he was wearing. Dark blue jeans lined his legs, and he wore a black shirt with a raging skull with batwings. Glancing at the band name, it read ‘Avenged Sevenfold’. Then his face. He had bags under his eyes, despite it being nine in the morning. A flat cap sat atop his head, and beneath it a pair of glasses. Most of his face was covered in a dark brown beard. Then were his eyes. They were green, she could tell that much. But what she noticed afterward was the pain in his eyes. They say the eyes are the gateway to the soul, and right here right now, Loona was gazing into her target’s soul; and all she could see what pain. This was a broken man. One who had suffered a life of hurt. The next thing she noticed was… longing. Whatever he was longing for outweighed his want to die. It was almost as if the reason he wanted to die was because he couldn’t have what he desired so much. There was something else, but she couldn’t put her finger on it.

Taking notice of her glance, Chris asked “you uh, you good there Mrs. Hitwoman?”

Breaking from her trance, Loona refocused her eyes on his face. He wasn’t afraid. If anything, he was accepting that this was the way things just had to be.

“What do you want?” Loona asked calmly.

“What? I want you to kill-“

“No, what do you really want. I know you only want to die because you can’t have what you want, so spill it already!”

“I want a friend!”

This shocked Loona. What did he mean he wanted a friend?

“The fuck is that supposed to mean?” Loona decided to interrogate the human. “You have friends, don’t you?”

That was when the mask fell. The man began to ball his eyes out. He laid his head on the coffee table and just cried.

“I don’t have any friends. I never have.” He said through tears. “Well technically I had friends, but only for a week or so before they decided to bully me.”

Loona stood still. She was in shock. This human wanted… a friend. She then realized what that other thing she saw in his soul. It was herself. Not that he knew of her existence before, but it was like looking into a mirror. Thinking back on her own life, she realized she’d never really had any friends either. Vortex was the first friend she’d had. Given the fact that she had a crush on him, and he was taken, she had decided to not get too close to Tex so as to not end up getting hurt.

Sitting before her, this human was in the same boat she was. She’d never considered suicide though.

Coming to this realization, Loona sat on the couch, and rubbed the human’s back. I can’t believe I’m doing this. Comforting a human. A target no less.

The human looked up at her, his eyes red and his face soaked with tears. “Why are you helping me?” He asked her.

“Because I want to.” She forced a smile, but she too was feeling down now. Too many bad memories had been brought back. Despite that, she decided she would fight her own tears and be strong… for him.

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